This video is necessary viewing for any baby with a dog. In other words, If you’re a baby, and you have a dog, and you hate cats, watch this video. You will learn a lot:
Animals or Babies? Cast your vote by clicking here
Okay, so the slant, in its typical, not-funny, not-cool, who-reads-the-slant-anyway, kinda way dropped a BOMB on its front page:
Seriously? I have three problems with your article, and I didn’t even get past the picture.
1) That is NOT a puppy. People who call dogs “puppies” embarrass me. I mean, when I hear “Puppy!”, I drop everything I got, turn around, sprint/run, whatever is needed. And you know what happens? I end up seeing this “puppy”…a massive, full-grown, barely-able-to-walk-it’s-so-old german shepherd. It’s English 101. If there are three things I learned in elementary school, it’s: 1) Don’t cry wolf 2) Don’t ask a fat woman if she’s pregnant, and 3) Don’t call a dog a “puppy.”
2) That dog is NOT adorable. Do you not have any standards? Are all babies cute?
3) Criminal Mastermind…a dog? Have you ever seen a guilty dog?? Are you human? Does a computer write the slant or something?? Did Cats vs. Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore go straight to your head? Everybody knows the dogs in that movie used stunt doubles.
I mean, c’mon. Yes, I’ll admit that dogs can be criminals…but nobody can safely argue that they have the intellectual capacity to be masterminds or the resolve to go all “Poker Face” on you when they get caught in the wrong.
Exhibit A-Z:
Hah. Silly dog. This is what I would call the classic “walk of shame” for dogs. Snoopin’ around, looking for something to chew…then all of a sudden, they get into the trash, and come running to their owners whining, begging for forgiveness.
Mastermind? No. Criminal? Maaaaaaybe.
It sure is good to be back. To kick things off we’ve decided to share with you a few of the top flicks coming out over the next few months. After all, its officially Fall, which means this year’s best films are around the corner.
1. Spooky Buddies
Good News! I guess Disney felt that this comedy was simply too cute for theaters, since its heading straight to DVD. For those not in “the know,” Spooky Buddies is the highly anticipated sequel to Space Buddies, which landed on DVD a few years back. The premise is simple: Rosebud, Butterballs, Buddha, B-Dog, and Muddbud are reunited for (another) adventure of a lifetime!
2. Dolphin’s Tail
This one’s been getting a ton of buzz from critics. It stars Red (yeah, the one from Shawkshank Redemption), who after escaping prison, falls in love with a dolphin. The catch is that this Dolphin has no tail (Oh NO!). Luckily, Red approaches a “legal” doctor in Mexico who is able to construct a prosthetic tail for the dolphin. Which is exactly why the movie is called Dolphin’s Tail. It’s a movie about a tail (and not a tale about a dolphin). Remember that.
3. Marley and Me: The Puppy Years
Here’s another one too good for theaters. I’m sure many of you have seen the original Marley and Me with Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston. I’ve yet to see this sequel, but based off of the trailer, it appears as though Marley has developed the ability to speak. I find this fascinating.
4. A Michael Vick highlight reel (FoR All Da HaTerZ):
